Ending Your Porn Battle. Part 2.
Hey guys! Parker here! So, in my last article, I opened up and dove into the meaning of what exactly laying it all down for Christ truly means regarding the pornographic industry. Throughout the article, I went over how as Christians, we need to understand that the Devil is a two-way liar and what he encourages us on now, He will later trash us on. Now there is much more that I wanted to pack into that one single post but thought, “Why not spread it out and create a whole series gauged towards helping young men, or anyone for that matter, with their addiction.”
In today’s post, I will begin to break down the scheme and lies of porn. But I will also break down some of the struggles that I went through that I want this audience to be aware of while reading. As you go through the article today, know that God is stronger than any of the battles you face, and through my addiction, the Lord has given me one of the biggest blessings of my life and is waiting to do the same with you.
“God is stronger than any of the battles you face.”
Pornography is a disease that will satisfy us at the moment but will later leave us with the desire for something more.
The problem with this truthful statement is the simple question, “where will young men go to fill that desire?“
You see, when we engage in addiction to porn, we begin to subconsciously seek out any way to fill our minds with something else, something pure. There is a longing for this sinful, sexual urge to be taken away and for the endless void to be filled. For many men, where this deadly disease often leads them to is a relationship.
For any blessed young man or woman that does not struggle with this (porn), I congratulate you. And for those that are fortunate enough not to wrestle with this specific desire for something more, the upcoming concept might be confusing.
But when you are addicted to porn. Or when I was addicted to porn. You long for anything good or anything right and not filled with sin. We all have this desire to escape an addiction that entangles us, and we often become convinced that a relationship is what will fill the void.
I am here to say that this is not the case. I can provide you with two main reasons for this.
The first reason is for the sake of the girl. When we become trapped in this cycle of pornographic sin, our souls are actively searching for something righteous, and most of the time, this leads to a Godly woman.
"Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak." 1 Corinthians 8:9.
Now, I am in no way saying that girls are weak or are more prone to falling short. I am saying that while struggling with a particular sin, we as men should not put ourselves into the dating world in hopes that young women can solve our sin. We can look deeper into scripture and see how the Lord speaks about those who cause others to sin, suggesting that they be tied down and drown in the sea.
“…we as men should not put ourselves into the dating world in hopes that young women can solve our sin.”
As a society, we are drawn to others and have the instinct to be surrounded by a community that can help us. This desire is completely normal, and in the right circumstance, has the power to empower those who are weak. However, what I see happening with men around me is heartbreaking. These men are merely experimenting with relationships in which they are not yet ready to participate.
When dealing with a struggle that causes you to desire other women, what gives you the right to take a wonderful woman of God who is pursuing Christ and become a physical stumbling block to her and her heavenly father.
Sexual sin is something we are commanded to flee from in scripture, so pairing with another person who is in a relationship with Christ does not add up when your struggle IS sexual sin.
Now, this does not at all mean you are not allowed in relationships though. First, you need to better your relationship with the one person who truly matters. This leads to my second point.
My second point is that there is only one relationship that will help in your porn battle. I see many advertisements online that promote apps, podcasts, series, or plans that will “set you free” from pornography. And they will, for a short time. Our souls are not something that can be wiped clean by an app store creation. What men need today is a heart restoration that ONLY Christ can offer. I say this to you, not as a salesman where all you must do is buy my monthly product. I say this to you as someone that has experienced everything mentioned above.
“Our souls are not something that can be wiped clean by an app store creation.”
Trust me, when I was addicted to pornography, a girlfriend did not take that addiction away. Guys, if I am honest, it makes your relationship more painful. Because in those times you are weak, you will choose someone online over the girl you have in your life. I’ve had the feeling. You watch porn the night before, then pretend to be a stand-up guy to your girlfriend the following afternoon. And I can say from experience that it does not work out.
But by God’s grace, I have received that restoration. I have had my outlook restored on relationships. And now I am a man who has received one of the greatest women on this earth. Through this woman, I was able to see that the part of my past that I resented and thought restricted me the most was something for which I should be grateful.
Someone once asked me, “If not for the events of your past, would you be the man you are today?”
There is something I realized and something I want you all to understand as well.
I could never give my girlfriend the amount of respect and servitude I have towards her if I had not gone through my pornography addiction.
So, what you see as the worst thing to ever happen to you, might be the thing that shapes you into the man God has planned for you to be for a woman. Freedom from your addiction is possible. The difference you need to understand is that quick fixes are temporary, but God’s restoration is permanent. With the Lord at the center of our lives, we demolish strongholds that we have allowed the enemy to build and we achieve the freedom that only God can bring.
I believe in you, Parker
