Hey guys! My name is Parker! I am a nineteen-year-old college student who just over a year ago (2019) got out of an addiction. This addiction is one that 90% of all young men are either currently trapped in or have escaped. And when I say young men, I mean as young as eleven years old. This deadly addiction wraps up boys and girls alike and traps them for many years of their life. Often, carrying on to older ages where addicted lives continue to be held captive.
This addiction is porn.
Thankfully I have been set free from these bonds. And now, I stare behind at the painful memories and damages created from my past decisions. However, I am not letting my past define me. I am allowing it to be an influence. Do not get me wrong, reflecting on my past is painful and often leads to me seeking forgiveness because of images that flash through my mind. Looking back, I can see how easy it is for youth to become caught in this industry.
This article will walk you through how my escape from this addiction was made possible. And as a heads up, it was not from friends or not having a smartphone but taken away after a fully surrendered life to Christ.
Porn is one of the words spoken in a group setting that will instantly make the environment awkward. At the mention of that word, people will either dive into the topic or suddenly act as they have never heard of the word.
I speak from experience and know for a fact that when the word is said, every single guy in the room is fully aware of what is behind it.
Pornography is a deadly virus that has been rapidly growing in our culture for many years. Not only does it corrupt our relationships with the people closest to us, but it spreads decay into our minds that will come back to attack us years later. To end our entanglement with this addiction, we must be willing to surrender it all. I am not talking about a partial confession but fully laying everything out on the table. And when I say laying it all out, I’m not just talking about giving it all to the Lord. Yes, being remorseful and expressing our repentance to the Lord is valuable and a crucial part of our walk to being set free. However, there is a deeper part of repentance that we need to incorporate into our lives.
You see, I convinced myself for years that I never needed to let my parents know about my addiction. Besides, I was not sinning against them or involving them in any way. By not letting them be aware, I was holding onto porn subconsciously.
I had given it to God and other leaders in my life but was unwilling to let the people closest to me know what I did behind closed doors.
To make clear: I understand the stressfulness of telling your parents or guardian. After all…
…it took me three years.
Thoughts or debates about which one would be better to confront. Or which one would come with less punishment. These are natural conversations that will go on in all our minds.
As followers of Christ, we must become comfortable with telling others about our struggles because exposing the sin allows accountability and our relationship with the Father to grow. But understand, our minds will be full of all the reasons we should not let others know.
For me, it was late at night when I told my mom. The specific thought that I wrestled with was worry about waking her up because of her lack of sleep. Simple excuses that we give to ourselves that hinder huge choices. In these circumstances, understand that the devil is a two-way liar.
“In these circumstances, understand that the devil is a two-way liar”
When you finish watching porn, he will make sure to let you know how you messed up, how you are weak, and how much of a failure you are. Then on the flip side, when you consider telling others to let your sin become exposed to the light, there are suddenly a million reasons why your struggle is not that bad or something that you can handle.
My question is that if we are aware of our sin and its hold on us, why are we so hesitant to let it go and become revealed to our brothers and sisters.
Do not let your fear hold you back from a life of following Christ.
When in these situations of debating to reveal our sin to others, do not let your flesh list all the reasons not to open up. Instead, draw your strength from the Lord and seek Him.
We must build up a determined mindset, one that sets its mind on a goal and does not back down to fear or uncertainty. We can apply this to all figures, not just our parents.
For me, letting my parents know was the last straw in showing God I was done.
I demonstrated that I was willing to let it all out if it meant I could be free of it. He was able to see the posture of my heart behind it and know that it was done not for attention, pity, or a reaction, but confessed out of a desperate heart that was willing to say I am finished I am fully surrendering it all to you.
What is the last straw you are holding onto? Dig deep. Pray the prayer of David asking the Lord to search your heart (Psalm 139: 23). Don’t let porn hold you back from the promise of life that the Lord lays out for your future.
– Parker
