There isn’t much need for an explanation as to why you’re here. Either you are currently hitting your breaking point, have been there for a while, or are ahead of the game just waiting for the stress-overload to occur, your reason may differ but the intent is most likely the same.
College is stressful. I’m writing this as a stressed college student myself. It’s okay to not be okay though, the biggest factor is that you don’t stay that way. So, let’s dive into some college “pick-me-ups” and advice that I have had to learn the hard way.
I want to preface with a warning:
Far too often, I have seen fellow college students and peers turn to substance abuse as means to ignore their present situations. I mean one, college is hard enough without the stress of being hungover, and two, all you are doing is trading momentary highs for the procrastination of your issues at hand.
Alcohol, drugs, and other forms of temporary satisfaction will all come to pass, and I urge each of you to truly deep dive into your heart and analyze what those substances are actually giving you. Religious standpoint aside, there is so much more this life has to offer you than solely using substances as your source of satisfaction.
Now, with that said, let’s dive into 6 ways to proactively handle stress as a college student.
1: Don’t overestimate your social limit
I’m an extrovert. I never personally took the enneagram test, but I’ve been repeatedly told I am a 7- the extroverted, optimistic, adventuring, and spontaneous one. On top of all this, I am a Public Relations major… so I communicate a LOT.
But even though communicating and engaging with people are things I love and natural abilities, there is a point where enough is enough. Coming to that realization isn’t the hard part as often, when my social limit is reached, I become easily agitated and have higher stress and in-tolerance rates. The difficult part is learning how to deal with these limits and how to competently manage your inner voice.
For myself, I often try to go go go until there is absolutely nothing left of me to contribute. This is what I mean by “don’t overestimate your social limit.” Don’t overestimate– even though you may be socially preconceived as things such an extrovert like me- your limit. You can’t keep swimming in a dried-up lake just like you can’t keep giving socially of yourself when you’ve drained yourself to the point where there’s nothing left.
So my friends, accept that you aren’t superman, and take steps to proactively process and adapt to your individual social limit.
2: Perspective changes everything
You know, I actually just took a midterm on interpersonal communication and how our mindset can shift outcomes, but I totally forget the official, scientific word for the process. So… for this point… I’m going to simply call it your perspective process. Don’t tell my professor haha!!
Seriously though, the way that you think and process situations and events in your life can directly affect the outcome and end result!
If you wake up in the morning immediately cultivating stress and unnecessary worry, then of course your day is going to seem more chaotic and your life a little less lovely. With that, the biggest piece of my advice is to fake it till you make it.
You aren’t perfect, so don’t hold yourself to that standard. Being honest is the best medicine you can embrace. Look up and see- this world can be beautiful if we only take time to open our eyes to its potential.
I’m not saying life will always be easy, in fact, far from it, but I am saying that through the trials, hurt, and road bumps, I promise that there is beauty within the ashes and light throughout the darkness.
I mean hey, in order to understand darkness, we must have once been in the presence of light, so don’t let the enemy lie you into believing you’re not worthy of the light because if you’re in the dark now, that just means you’re on the journey back to the light.
3: Distinguish places often utilized in your life
Stress is an often all-consuming & extremely inconvenient emotional toll that erodes our physical and emotional well-being. Therefore, one thing that I have had to implement into my own life is to distinguish and separate my living space from my workspace. For example, my kitchen is a safe space– a place where I can relax by preparing meals to nourish my body. My kitchen is not a space to cram in an exam study session.
Now, apart from my kitchen, my bed is my sleep space. I don’t do homework in my bed because then my brain will latch on to the connection that my bed is a study space. This, in turn, harms my sleep cycle as my body is thrown into disequilibrium over what I am actually supposed to be doing in that spot.
My living room is a little bit of everything. The right-hand side of my couch is where I often type papers, my recliner is where I read textbooks as it is under a lamp, and the rest of the couch is where I like to layout and watch Netflix. … that is when I have time to actually watch television!
All in all, I urge you to distinguish spaces in your home for individual events. Separate the stress from where you are meant to live.
Now, if you reside in a dorm, leave that area to be your living space. Enjoy community, relationships, and sleep within that space, and for studying find a spot on campus like the Library. I PROMISE that this will allow your brain to relax and de-stress when you form spaces where it feels safe to do so.
4: Eat Well, Sleep Well
Okay, I know, this one is obvious, but seriously, it’s SO SO easy to forget!! If you’re here, you are probably stressed, and if you are like me, that leads to unhealthy eating habits and a lack of deep sleep.
Your body will not only manage the stress better, but physically you will be much more stable if you are nourishing yourself with a healthy balance of healthy food along with “fun food.” Now, don’t go down a pint of ice cream if you are stressed each night, but rather, treat yourself to a scoop every now and then. Train your body to turn to emotional restoration rather than the momentary nourishment of lays potato chips and Hershey’s chocolate. (I’m not being mean, trust me, I’ve turned to potato chips my fair share as well.)
Along with eating well, make sure you’re resting well. Four hours of sleep will NOT benefit you… trust me. Try and get around 7 hours of sleep a night.
I remember going into college, people would tell me I needed 8-10 hours, but let’s face it, nobody has time to actually get upwards of 10 hours of sleep a night… especially in college. So, a more feasible option and what I have found to be doable is getting at least 7 hours of sleep a night.
Sleep and nourishment, whether you believe me or not, I PROMISE will better your stress cycles.
I mean hey, I’m not coming at you from a numerical and statistical standpoint, rather, I am writing to you from experience and personal recommendations of what has worked for me. So, take it or leave it, but I am genuinely writing to you as a current college student that is often entangled in the same cycles of stress you too may be facing.
5: Engage in HEALTHY self-care
“Self-care.”
We hear that word all. the. time.
What I have found though is that all too often, we correlate self-care with unhealthy gluttony and outrageously expensive placebos. Trust me, a $452 shopping spree coined as “self-care” is anything but that for a broke college kid. All you are doing is making the situation progressively worse as you prolong unnecessary financial stress on top of already heavy burdened college stress.
Therefore, learn to engage in HEALTHY self-care. No, not healthy as in green smoothies for breakfast… although those are good too, but rather, self-care that is practical, manageable, and accessible.
For myself, I invest in a local youth group where I leave all school work behind and invest in my surrounding community for a few hours each Sunday night. Related to that, I use Sunday morning service to rejuvenate my soul and de-stress through worship.
Besides church involvement, I go grocery shopping and allocate myself $15-ish dollars to spend on things that I will not only utilize but also enjoy. For example, this past week, I went to Marshals and purchased a tea that I had been wanting, and I use that to breathe in the evenings and reflect on my day. In this time, I also journal, which I would HIGHLY recommend.
6: Sometimes it takes realizing that you can’t to fully embrace that God can
I use this point to end as it is here that change and understanding make all the difference.
Truly, if this past year of college has taught me anything, it is that it has taken reaching extremely stressful and chaotic breaking points, to fully accept that I alone cannot do this life. It is in my falling short that God steps in to display His grace, love, and patience over my life.
God isn’t some mean guy waiting to correct your wrong moves with a ruler in heaven. Rather, He is gracious and gentle in his love as He walks beside us even when we try to ignore His presence. All too often, I attempt to do this life on my own, and it is within those times that my stress can become overwhelming. I have to remind myself daily to choose to embrace my can’t so that God can.
All in all, stress is a pain. Simply put, it can be a nuisance sometimes. But, stress isn’t impossible to overcome. There are measures to avoid stress, get out of it, and endure it healthily. Truthfully, managing stress is an extremely personal topic as it is going to depend on you as the individual with how to best cope with it. Don’t be ashamed to have stress though, it’s a normal thing. Not a good thing, but not an out-of-the-ordinary thing either.
I believe in you.
Now, I want to leave you with one last nugget of help: find a community.
You can’t do this alone. So please, don’t try to.
Rather, find those who you can trust that are confidential and comforting to be there for you as a cornerstone while you navigate this life. Don’t overcomplicate that which has so much potential for beauty. This world isn’t all that bad, there are just times that clouds get in between our view of the sun.
Don’t lose hope. I promise stress doesn’t have to be your end. Rather, let it be the beginning of a beautiful turning point where you take back your life and live out your dreams, aspirations, and God-given potential.
In love, Halie Kay
